All of your ego’s responses come out of fear. He / she who acts fearlessly, is acting from authenticity (which is different from the ego).
The ego is your coat of armor; it’s what you use to protect yourself. As a child, you started feeling fearful because of the 60,000 NO’s you heard between age two and six. Do you know what you did about that? You created a false version of the original you IN ORDER TO PROTECT YOURSELF.
You created this false version of yourself (ego), so no one could harm your real nature. You were saying to the world, “It’s not the real me that you are scolding – it’s a false version of me … ha ha to you.” Not a bad trick, except most of us never drop the coat of armor; we live our lives from the ego – forever reacting to fear (be it fear of intimate relationships, fear of money, fear of adventure, blah, blah, blah).
You are looking into your ego right now. GOOD! Once you see the basic cause of your ego, life gets easier. Perhaps you cannot shed the ego all at once, like a snake sheds its skin in springtime, but becoming aware of the cause gives you a great start.
Student: So what is the ego – the symptom or the disease?
Teacher: Great question; the ego is the symptom; the disease is the different fears that come with 60,000 NO’s.
The secret to success, when dealing with the ego is this: begin looking at your fears. When I was twelve, I had pimples on my back. I feared that I would be made fun of, so I always wore a t-shirt at the lake, when swimming. There, right there, was my ego (my coat of armor). I decided that I was an individual who made up my own mind … and I decided I would never take my t-shirt off in public, and no one could make me. This decision became part of my ego’s point of view. Did the EGO do me harm, or did the FEAR do me harm?
The ego was simply a symptom of the fear … the fear did me harm; the fear of being humiliated. My coat of armor was to act tough and insist that I think for myself (so nobody’s going to tell me what to do).
So, if you want to recreate yourself anew, don’t fight with the ego; look at the fear that created the ego and deal with that. Why are so many millions afraid of money? They must be – so few have it. Why are so many millions afraid of being humiliated? They must be – so few dare to dance like nobody’s watching. Why are so many millions of people afraid of ill-health? They must be – hospitals are filled with people with psychosomatic illnesses (doctors estimate its as high as 60%).
All human beings experience fear of one kind or another. Perhaps a few don’t, but the rest of us do; this is why we all have egos.
The answer to recreating oneself anew is to accept the fears you have, and decide to work on ridding yourself of them. If you do this effectively, you do not have to deal with your ego; it will vanish on its own. If it has no reason to protect you from fear, it has no raison d’etre (reason for being).
2012 is a great year to begin working on your fears – fear of poverty, fear of loss of any kind, fear of criticism, fear of success, fear of death, fear of loneliness, fear of the world coming to an end (according to the Mayan Calendar). What is one fear that it’s time to work on?
You took on a personality to hide your fears, now take on the courage to look directly at your fears (the fire-eating dragon ‘harrumphs’ and walks away when the dragon slayer confronts him face to face).
With even a small but sincere wish to understand your fear, something cracks wide open – your EGO! Now you see things totally different; you are a little more conscious, which causes more cracking.
What is a fear that gives life to your ego? What do you do to protect yourself from the fear? What past fear no longer affects your attitude or mood? How did you deal with it to vanish it from your psychic state of being?
Have fun with this; leave us a comment. Your insights bring the conversation alive.